What is Confidence and Where Do We Find It?


Why is it that some people have it and some people are left wondering… how can I get that? Confidence can be an elusive thing sometimes, particularly when you’re relatively new to something. Now just for a moment, imagine yourself in a situation where you really need to be confident and someone is looking to you for answers, solutions, advise or motivation and you know you can help them. How does that feel? Write a description of what it feels like, where you feel it and where did it come from?

I quite regularly work with clients who are looking for their confidence and I also run workshops on How to Become Confident. My coaching and therapy clients often tell me that they lack a sense of confidence and they want to know how they can raise their level of confidence. The answer I give them is that confidence comes from with in. We have all had the experience of feeling confident. And because of that experience you can find confidence deep inside you and apply it at any given moment. You may be saying to yourself, ‘yeah right’ And the answer to that is Yes, Really!

Confidence can have a profound effect on how your clients see you and whether they will follow your advice or signing up for your service or rave about you to there friends and family. When your confidence shines through in your communication, your clients will have confidence in you.

You can find it in a memory of a time when you felt really confident. Remember when you learned to ride your bicycle, if you were like me you were afraid to let go of the handlebars. Now years later, you get on your bike and talk to your friends, look around and maybe even go over jumps and down steep slopes etc, all without thinking about it. The secret is that the confident memory doesn’t have to relate to your current situation. All you have to do is access that feeling of confidence and wear it like some expensive designer clothes that make you fell really good about yourself.

Of course, I have a technique to get you there and help you to embody that feeling of confidence step by step. The key to having this technique work well is to let go and use your imagination. Your mission is to practice this technique and lete me know your results. Here it is…

1. Close your eyes and imagine a time when you felt really confident.
2. Visualize every thing that is going on around you and make the colors bright.
3. Hear any sounds that were happening at that time.
4. And pay close attention to how you are feeling. The emotions and sensations really count.
5. Imagine this experience of confidence as is it were happening right this moment.
6. Slowly open your eyes and bring this feeling of confidence into this moment in time.
7. Give yourself a personal reminder cue or trigger like a word or signal that will let you bring up this memory when ever you want it.
8. Condition this for yourself by repeating this process at least 10 times.
9. Then when you really need some confidence you can trigger it on cue when ever you want.
10. ENJOY.

Want to know more about my Coaching Training or Coaching Services? They are full of amazing ways to get the client results and client referrals you’ve been looking for. I know personally that I can’t do it alone and you don’t have to either. So I want you to know that I am approachable and work in a way that empowers you to take responsibility for your own development with me just as a guide to keep you on track.

Have fun, be bold and be confident.

Simon 😀

Published by

Simon Maryan

Former Royal Marine and Human Intelligence Specialist. Now an international speaker, author, trainer and coach sharing lessons from a life of action and how to prepare for and overcome trauma and other stressful situations. I've survived 3 kidnapping & all my experience enabled me to develop extremely strong psychological and mental resilience which I share with people through my speaking engagements delivering a variety of Keynote, motivational and inspirational talks for a wide variety of clients internationally. Some of these include UK Military, FBI, New York Police Department, NYPD Hostage Negotiation Team (the home of Hostage Negotiation), oil and gas companies, banks and UK Government departments.

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